that is NOT sour cream...

Oh my blue eyed freckled faced boy. Today at the dinner table you did something that made me laugh so hard I got a side ache.  I couldn't talk through my laughter and I am so glad you laughed to... because I want you to see the humor in life and know that laughing is sometimes the only way to deal with things...

Things like when I ask you how in the world you managed to get sour cream (from your gourmet dinner of bean and cheese burritos) all the way onto your shoulder...

and you (like a perfectly perfect gross little boy with little by the way of of manners even though I nag you constantly about it) proceed to LICK IT OFF YOUR SHOULDER.

and it only takes a moment to realize that it was not sour cream.

Oh, no.

It was bird poop.

From your long day of bike riding.

And I am positive we will never think of sour cream the same- and we will always remember the day you ate bird poop burritos. Hopefully you learned that it is not polite to lick your shoulder at the dinner table.

It is, however, polite to laugh your guts out if someone eats poop ate the table. 

It is also polite to remove your soiled shirt for the rest of the meal and show off the guns.

I just make up manners as I go. go with it ok?