There has been a lot going on these past few days. I have debated about how much to write about, but I also know that there are so many of our loved friends and family that would love to know what has happened I also am so exhausted of telling the sad story that perhaps this will be a therapeutic exercise for me.
I first have to say that I know for certain when I look back on this time in my life I will remember it as one of the most spiritual times in my life. I truly feel surrounded by the Spirit each day and I have felt the Lords angels around me.
Shortly after learning I was pregnant about a week and a half ago, Derek and I realized that we had become one of the unlucky one tenth of of 100 people that experience an ectopic pregnancy. We didn't know anything about it and have been on a roller coaster of emotions after being fully educated. It truly is beyond any sadness I have ever experienced in my life. I have in the same moment been scared for my own life and even more heartbroken at the loss of one that will never be.
I will spare most of the details. For now we are still waiting for this all to be over. Because there is still a good possibility that I will have to have surgery, I will ask for your prayers and faith. I really need that more than anything. More than dinner, or babysitting. I need that comfort only the spirit can bring.
Right now it hurts to be standing in the Lords refining fire. It's hard to understand why the answer is no sometimes, but in the past, that has always been before the greatest blessings have come into my life. Until then, we will will continue to be patient and wait for another miracle to come our way.
